Posted in Bible study, Devotion, From the Insideout, Journey Through The Word, LGG Study, The Fruit of the Spirit

What Love Really Looks Like

Inspired by the LGG Study, The Fruit of the Spirit / week1, day2

The Road Map for today’s Journey: 1 Corinthians 13:1-7; SOAP: verses 4-5

Patience and Kindness

4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 1 Corinthians 13:4-5

I believe 1 Corinthians 13:1-7 is one of (if not) the most beautifully written passages Paul wrote. I have memorized it, stitched it, and tried to practice it. I have also failed at it and found myself thankful that His love never fails.

While we will focus on verses 4 and 5 today, we would be remiss not to address Paul’s opening remarks in this portion of His letter to the Corinthian believers. They apparently had misunderstood the value of their spiritual gifts, which he addressed earlier in his letter. At the very least, they had allowed their gifts to cause division within the church. They had come to believe, as Bibleref.com explains, that “some were more spiritual than others because of their gifts,1” which was causing even more division in the Church. Paul’s words here were meant to help them understand that their gifts, and even their sacrifices, were of no value to themselves or for God’s glory without love.

Now that he has addressed their misunderstanding and/or misappropriation of their gifts, Paul begins to explain what love is and how it should look. Keep in mind that Paul is not referring to brotherly or sexual love here, but to agape love, a selfless love not based on feeling but poured out, like Mary’s oil, in action. It is meant to be ongoing action in a believer’s life and relationships.

Paul gives his readers a list that includes many descriptions of what godly love is and is not. We will look at nine of them today. Two of them belong in the love is category and the rest in the love is not list.

  • Love is patient heads the list. If you’re wondering how this is an action, it requires waiting; and as some commentaries point out, it waits without resentment or guilt directed at the one or the thing you are waiting on.
  • Love is kind, which is defined by bibleref.com as “acting for the good of others even when it does not benefit us.”

The first of the is not / does not list is

  • Love is not envious (or jealous). This was particularly important for the Corinthian believers to understand, given their obvious struggle with envy when it came to their spiritual gifts. However, we would be wise to keep ourselves in check in this area as well – as we live in a ‘keeping up with the Joneses’ kind of world. Remember, love is not envious but sets aside “self” to celebrate the success of others.
  • Love does not boast (or brag). Similar to not being envious, this one reminds us not to promote self but instead to praise God and lift up others for the good they have done or said.
  • Love is not puffed up (or arrogant). As explained by bibleref.com, “Arrogance involves confidence in oneself above all others and the expectation that everyone else should feel the same way. Love removes the obstacle of self from the purpose of serving others well.
  • Love is not rude. The word rude here is more than just forgetting to open the door for a lady or interrupting a conversation. To make sure we have a right/full understanding of rudeness in this context, I’m sharing the full statement from bibleref.com on this ‘is not’: “To be rude is to act “indecently.” Rudeness was on display in the church in Corinth in their disorderly worship services and selfish communion meals (1 Corinthians 11:17–22), as well as in the man who was sleeping with his father’s wife (1 Corinthians 5:1–2). Rudeness insists on self-expression and self-gratification at the expense of the feelings and experience of others.
  • Love does not demand its own way (is not self-seeking). I love this helpful explanation from bibleref.com: “Love yields.” The commentary goes on to explain that much of the church’s problems would have disappeared if they focused on looking for ways to meet each other’s needs before satisfying their own.
  • Love is not irritable (or easily angered). A quick temper, according to bibleref.com, is often evidence of viewing other people as obstacles to reaching one’s own goals. Instead, the commentary suggests, “Love views serving other people as the goal itself, removing one reason to flare up when they get in our way.”
  • Love is not resentful (or does not keep a record of wrongs). It is easy to hold on to a grudge, to keep a running list of how others have offended us, to vow that we will never forgive them for the hurt they have caused us; but friends, that is not love. Instead, the love of Christ in and for us should move us to love and forgive as He has loved and forgiven us. Ask yourself, what has He forgiven me for – make a list if you have to – even if you don’t; it is a good list to have and to refer to often, especially if/when you are struggling to forgive others. Remember, He doesn’t just forgive us; He died so that we can be forgiven.

Reflection and Application


Looking at the description of love in 1 Corinthians 13…

  • Which characteristic of love feels most challenging for you right now? Why?
  • How did Jesus exhibit patience and kindness?
    • What are some ways you show patience and kindness?

The More We Know

  1. What does 1 Corinthians 13:3 mean? ↩︎

Posted in Bible study, From the Insideout, Journey Through The Word, Quiet Time

One In The Spirit

 Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace.

Ephesians 4:3

We live in a world that is ‘self-driven’. The ‘I have to have the best’, ‘be the best’, and ‘be better than her’ attitude is prevalent. Not only do we expect better than the best from ourselves we demand it from others, and we have little to no tolerance for those who do not measure up. While there is nothing wrong with being motivated and wanting to ‘do your best’, or even expecting others to do their best – Paul teaches us here and throughout his writings, that we are to be God-driven rather than ‘self-driven’. His words to “Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit,” are preceded by the wisdom of how to do this, wisdom that basically teaches putting others first. He teaches humbleness, gentleness, patience, and making allowance for other’s faults – and he bases it on our love – which, according to Jesus’ teaching, is supposed to mirror His love for us, (john 13:34) – and His love was anything but selfish and self-driven. Where this love is absent, self will be prevalent and there will be no true unity. This is why Paul doesn’t suggest that we do this on our own but instead says to “make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace.”

It strikes me as I’m writing and glancing back up at verse 1, where Paul begs the believers to lead a life worthy of someone who is called by God – that we are not just called to salvation but rather to live out that salvation. To love as Jesus loved, to be His hands and feet to the world, to go and make disciples, to edify and encourage others, to lift up the weak, and pray for the sick, and so much more. God’s calling is not easy but He made it all possible by giving us His Spirit – who not only binds us together with peace and in love but empowers, teaches, and guides us to do all that God has called us to do, even live at peace with other believers who we may not see eye to eye with.

Are you having trouble living at peace with someone or a group of someones? The Spirit of God is your answer – your strength and hope of overcoming the barriers to the unified peace God has called us to. May we heed Paul’s words and “because of [our love] make every effort to keep ourselves united in the Spirit, binding ourselves together with peace“. In this, God will be glorified and we will know His peace.

Response to God’s Word

Father as the old hymn says, “bind us together – with cords that cannot be broken – bind us together in love” – In Jesus’ name I pray, amen and amen!

Notes from the insideout journal –